While I still suffer from Severe, Chronic, Complex PTSD, today I can celebrate the woman I am and have become. I found this poem which I would like to share with you. It speaks of my journey over the last 10 years and helps me to celebrate the healing that has happened in my life. It speaks of my resiliency even though I live daily with the disabling effects of early and long term trauma.
Imagine a woman who believes it is right and good that she is a woman
A woman who honors her experience and tells her stories
Who refuses to carry the sins of others within her body and life.
Imagine a woman who believes she is good
A woman who trusts and respects herself
Who listens to her needs and desires and meets them with tenderness and grace
Imagine a woman who has acknowledged the past’s influence in the present
A woman who has walked through her past
Who has healed the present
Imagine a woman who authors her own life
A woman who exerts, initiates, and moves on her own behalf
Who refuses to surrender except to her truest self and wisest voice
Imagine a woman who imagines the divine in her image and likeness
Imagine a woman in love with her own body
A woman who believes her own body is enough, just as it is
Who celebrates her body as an exquisite resource
Imagine a woman who honors the face of the goddess
A woman who celebrates the accumulation of her years and her wisdom
Who refuses to use precious energy disguising the changes in her body and life
Imagine a woman who values the women in her life
A woman who sits with others
Who is reminded of the truth about herself when she forgets
Now imagine yourself as this woman….
Patricia Lynn Reilly in Womb Wisdom: Awakening the Creative and Forgotten Powers of the Feminine by Padma and Anaiya Aon Prakasha (2011) Destiny Books, Rochester, Vermont.
I am full of tears on the inside because I am this woman today. I touch into the power and joy of it each time I read this poem so it is part of my morning ritual now.
It is my life’s purpose to share and tell stories and to break the silence of living with physical and mental illness. Therefore, my blogs will be from the heart. I do not know how to write any other way. I will share what I have learned over the last 10 years and what I continue to learn that is helping me come to this place of being fully human, fully alive while managing PTSD. I do not share these stories to say I have the answers. I will come from this place of sharing how I learned to trust my innate wisdom and healing energy within me even though I have not been able to eradicate my PTSD. I will share what has worked for me to come to this place in my life. I can only voice what has worked for me and to support you in finding your own innate healing wisdom of your own evolutionary path.