The words I am raining on the inside, my heart wells up with tears that want to pour by Amy Grant rings true for me today. I have everything I want in life and more for after all all I ever sought after was an abundance of love. I have that in my life and it fills me with wonder, amazement and awe. However, this all contributes to my deep suffering and for that I want to cry but I am unable to release this suffering through tears. I have to sit with open hands. I feel myself pleading for relief and I embrace all of it in the present moment. I embrace and love that I am so fully alive yet I mourn such deep suffering. I long for a central nervous system that is not hyperaroused while experiencing wonder and amazement. I cry out to the universe for relief.